Showing posts with label Saving. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Saving. Show all posts

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

To Hold on: Saving a Marriage

Marriage is a union between two people recognized by the Church and the State. In today's society, married couples are having problems when it come to their married life and most of the time resort to the how to's in saving a marriage that is on the rocks. It might be brought by the environment that we have now. We are having different kinds of men and women as well as couples. Unlike our mothers and fathers before who struggled to put their marriage life on the best position ever, couples now are not patient and even responsible.

There might be so many factors that happened before one would want to file a divorce. It can be that the husband has been violating the wife or the wife has been laundering the savings. But no matter what the reason is, one must first think for more than a couple of times before posting the decision. Most especially if the couple already has kids. It could be more depressing and harder.

For more than decades now, problematic couples always seek the help of marriage counsellors in solving their marital problems. They spend a lot of money in attending regular sessions with a counsellor, but in the end, most of them still end up signing the divorce papers. So what could be the problem? The problem is, this couple never realized their capability to patch things up just by themselves. Couples should just have to change their mindset about their marriages. If you think that there is a problem, you need to focus on it the soonest possible time. Never wait until it gets worse and it ends up drastically not only for the both of you but also for your kids.

Couples should always think of their children before making big decisions about their marriage life. Children are very vulnerable and what pain they experience when they were children, they will remember until they grow old and have minds of their own. The catch is that, children should be the knot tying their parents together. They are the encouragement and inspiration of their mothers and fathers. In this case, the former should never disregard their children when making their say about the problems of the family.

You should remember that during the wedding rites, you promise God and all the witnesses of the marriage that you will live in sickness and in health, in richer and in poorer, so as long as you can still handle the situation, you need to do your best to do it before breaking down. Sometimes, we are just too carried away by our emotions that we think the only answer is going to the lawyer and ask help on how to draft a divorce paper. But this is not the last solution there is. You can still talk sincerely, taking all the prejudices away. When the prejudice has gone away, there still can be a possibility that the both of you will see marriage life in a new light- this time happy and good.


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Monday, October 18, 2010

The art of saving a relationship

Relationships last long because they are well taken care of. But what happens if the relationship becomes Rocky? How are you going to fix or save it? Sometimes still a moment in our relationships in which we learn about some of the difficulties and struggles. They are just normal that the relationship would not develop relationships if all composed of good times. More importantly, the relationship and the people involved in this does is not responsible in this case.

If your relationship is on the rocks, what could be the possible solution? Relationships become damage when one of them became too busy time is already being set. When the person becomes unresponsive and sometimes demanding is also an important factor. Perhaps couples should not step to control each other. It is always important to leave their partner know that they appreciate so despite the fact that they must attend certain important issues all the time. And even if the time should be spent together is risky, a drawback should always be offered by the lost time. And when you have this chance or opportunity, you must make sure that you pass moments with each other and quality time.In this way, even if you're too busy during the week, your partner is something you rappeler.Les shared moments are the most precious treasure they could maintain.

Relationships become dangerous when the mistakes of the past have been repeated again and again. Sometimes because we believe that the relationship was able to last for long time, we make mistakes even without our partners giving much attention to it. But, like all human beings, our partners can also get injured and tired so try not test patience your partner with this step.Every day arguments are very malsain.Si you continue the relationship just argue every day, what is the point of law? Recycling old arguments just for the sake of having a topic to argue on is also stupid think therefore twice to try to make use of the technique.

But there are also some great one things should avoid trying to save a relationship. Firstly, do not look so desperate. Anyone tell you that despair is ugly and humiliating. If you think that you'll get sympathy, you do so, then only two times.Desperation means that you do not trust yourself and your partner.Saving a relationship reveals your partner that you are strong, confident, decisive.Second place is, try changing your partner to save the relation.Parfois, an idea false commune which relationships get mountain because one of them has some problems of nature, to the other should change lui.La trust is, you cannot save it if you are not willing to submit / itself elle.Forçage him / it change simply mean that you are controlling your partner and you are not happy with it / is.

It is simply things a few couples should keep in mind, if they want their relationships thrive long.


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What To Do When Your Husband Won't Work On Saving Your Marriage (3 Things You Must Do)



What do you do when your husband won't work on saving your marriage? I know how frustrating and hopeless it must feel to be stuck in a one-sided relationship. So to save yourself some pain and anguish, please take my advice and do these following 3 things.
#1 To Do: Figure out what you want from your husband and your marriage. Write a list.
When you husband won't work on your marriage, the only thing you can do is to look inwards and work on what you can change - yourself.
One way to do this, is to sit down and think hard about what you really want from your husband and your marriage. Create a list of all the things you desire.
Once you have your list, turn each 'item' into a specific action. For example, if you wrote "I want him to talk more", put down "I want him to talk with me for 15 minutes each day, while maintaining eye contact'.
Be as specific as you can about what you want because words like "more" are too vague, and have different meanings to each person.
#2 To Do: Write down why you want these things and why you think you deserve to have these things.
There are two reasons for this step.
The first reason is that men are logical creatures - they need reasons to do things. At work, when he is proposing a new initiative, he needs to back it up with good reasons for going ahead with it. Similarly, since you are proposing a change in your relationship, provide him some good reasons to do what you ask.
The reason second is: We only get what we think we deserve. If you notice that you don't really believe that you deserve to have what you want, then you will need to convince yourself first, before you can convince your husband.
#3 To Do: Communicate what you want to your husband, and why you want these things, by writing your husband an email or letter.
Since your husband is being uncooperative, starting a conversation with him to work on your marriage might only make him close up more and even resent you.
Instead of making matters worse, I suggest you write a letter or an email to your husband so he has the time to think about his response.
The added benefits of writing a letter includes:
- being able to reorganize your thoughts
- making sure you've included all your points
- being able to re-word your sentences
- avoiding being interrupted.
Remember to end your letter or email by saying something like "Please reply and share your thoughts. I am open to negotiation." If you don't request him to reply, he might not know what to do next.
I hope you will use these 3 suggestions on 'what to do when your husband won't work on saving your marriage' so your relationship can move forward.

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We Can Work It Out: How to Solve Conflicts, Save Your Marriage (Perigee)